Parents, what is the best gift to give to your children?

The gift I’m sharing with you will not cost you a penny, but it will cost you everything! My life’s experiences tell me that the more gifts you give your children throughout the year the less they appreciate them. They open the gift and then look around and say, “What else is there?” There are not enough gifts in life to bring complete satisfaction to a child’s desire.

Godly parenting is the best priceless gift you can give to your children. Relationships with our children will last forever. Let me explain it this way. Each person born into this world has a soul that will live forever. God gave all of us free will choice in the outcome of our lives. But the major thing we must understand is the impact of parent/child relationships.

Parents are the first ‘god with skin on’ that children know. The father is to be the priest/pastor of the home – to be ‘godlike’ – love as God loves – lead as God leads – correct gently as God corrects. The mother is to be the ‘Azar’ – helper like God – to both husband and children. Both Holy Ghost filled father and mother are to be controlled by the Fruit of the Spirit – Gals. 5. If you want love, joy, and peace in your family then you must be patient, kind, gentle, good, faithful and have self-control.

It’s heartbreaking as a counselor to see the emotional, relational, and spiritual, (and physical) damage to children who are raised by an abusive parent/parents. The Bible teaches that words have the power of life or death. When a parent abuses a child in any way (verbally-emotionally, physically, sexually), it is an abomination unto God (God is disgusted and He hates the sin of abuse).

When a child is born, God’s plan is that the child is to be protected, loved, cherished, nourished and raised to love and serve Him. God instituted the safe harbor of the family for children. He is our Heavenly Father. We are His children. He never abuses us. His admonition is always gentle. He corrects us with His unconditional love. As we get to know Him through His Spirit and His Word, He gives us direction on how to live life and shares His plan for us in eternity.

God’s love was proven to us by His willingness to be the complete sacrifice for our sins by dying on a cruel painful cross. After He was beaten, He had a crown of thorns crushed on His head and was speared in His side with a sword as He hung on the cross. He told us to love Him with our whole heart, soul, mind, and strength and love our neighbor as our self. He tells us through His Word to be holy as He is holy! As our Heavenly Father, He expects us to parent our children with the same loving care He shows through His love, mercy, and compassion toward us.

If you are a parent who claims to be the ‘temple of the Holy Ghost’, you must be Holy Ghost controlled. Your words and actions represent God to your children. If you yell, scream and threaten your children to get them to obey, you are out of control. If you abuse your children in any way, you are a dysfunctional parent and in trouble with God.

God expects you to teach your children right from wrong. He expects you to teach them behavior boundaries, to respect you as their parent and respect others. You can only teach respect by being respectful. A parent who is Holy Ghost controlled will allow the Fruit of the Spirit to control his/her actions.

God wants you to share the plan of salvation. We are all born sinners. We must repent of our sins, be baptized in the precious name of the Lord Jesus Christ, and receive His gift of the Holy Ghost – Acts 2. We must teach our children every day when we get up in the morning, walking, sitting and going to bed at night – Duet. 6. Our life’s action is the most powerful message to your children. Can your children see God in you?

Parents are to set a hedge of protection around their family that produces love, joy, and peace. To do this, parents must be kind, gentle, faithful, good, patient and have self-control. There is never a reason to lose control, yell, scream, batter or abuse a child. This is sin against God first and, secondly, it is an abhorrent action to a child.

I counsel adults who have a salvation experience with God, but they are so emotionally wounded from abusive childhoods that their adult relationships are hurting and they have a distorted God concept. When the birth father/mother are domineering, controlling, and abusive, children have no concept of unconditional love, self-respect or (emotional-physical-relational) boundaries.

If you are a parent with an abusive childhood history, please do not repeat this major dysfunction with your children. Make the decision to stop the generational abuse and seek God’s guidance and healing. How you parent your children will be a major factor in whether they decide to follow Christ.

You are to discipline in love, not anger. Be firm, but gentle. When you teach godly obedience from infancy, you will not have an out-of-control, rebellious child. Read The Strong-Willed Child & Dare to Discipline by Dr. James Dobson. It’s never too late to become the godly parent you need to be. Your actions do speak loudly to your children. If you are a hypocrite, they know it.

Our children, who are now 39 & 43 years old, told us years ago they knew we had love for God, love for each other and had integrity by our honesty – admitting when we were wrong and asking for forgiveness. I give God all the glory because that is the priceless gift my parents gave to me. By the help of the Holy Ghost, we tried to the best of our ability to pass this gift to our children.

All of us are responsible to God for every thought, feeling, and action in our lives. I want my words and attitudes to be a blessing to my children and grandchildren. If you were not given this priceless gift of godly parenting, it’s never too late to change and start giving this gift to your children. We are to be a living sacrifice that is our reasonable service as unto the Lord.

© Carol Clemans – August 2018 – Holy Ghost 63 years, Bible teaching over 50 years, Certified Pastoral Counselor 26 years, teaching for churches/conferences.

Carol Clemans is a Certified Pastoral Counselor, inspirational Bible teacher for churches/conferences. She provides nationwide counseling by phone/Facetime/Facebook video/Skype.com. (636) 448-0121. Carol’s heartbeat is helping others heal/grow spiritually, emotionally and relationally – www.carolclemans.org – teaching CD’s – book: GOD’S DESIGN FOR MARRIAGE – teaches marriage seminars. Mins. Ref: Pastor Daniel Batchelor, Dupo, IL.

 

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About Me

Carol Clemans is a Certified Pastoral Counselor (27 years), Bible conference speaker, Christian Life Coach and author. She provides counseling nationwide by phone/web cam. The mission for Carol’s teaching, counseling and writing is to help others grow and heal spiritually, emotionally and relationally.

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