In my 71 years of life, I have experienced some great joys and some deep sorrows. In over 50 years of ministry including 25 years as a Certified Pastoral Counselor (now providing confidential counseling nationwide by phone, Skype, Facetime, Facebook video – read ‘about ministry’ page – speaking for churches/conferences @ www.carolclemans.org), I have shared in the joys and sorrows of thousands of people.
Proverbs 14:10 (NLT)
10 Each heart knows its own bitterness,
and no one else can fully share its joy.
This wisdom is informing us that we cannot feel exactly what someone else feels. Each person knows his/her own depth of bitterness and heartache. It also informs us that we cannot fully understand the depth of someone’s joy. Each individual has his/her own exclusive feelings in their heights of joy or depths of sorrow.
For example, the feelings I have regarding the death of my parents could be totally opposite of another person’s feelings regarding the death of his/her parents. My memories are joyful. Another person could have abusive painful memories.
I have had the unfortunate experience of trying to share my feelings about a loss to another and they ‘put off’ what I shared. They did not even try to put their ‘feet in my shoes.’ That reaction added to the emotional pain.
In the body of Christ, we need to nurture self to be empathetic toward others. We do not have to experience everything to be able to show others that we care about their sorrows and their joys.
Romans 12:15 (NLT)
15 Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.
We are to rejoice with others in their happiness. This is the easy response to others. But more importantly, we need to weep with those who weep in their time of sorrow. We cannot make them feel better. Our being with them and allowing them to weep is the best comfort. Don’t speak empty words – they are useless in a time of sorrow. Be interactive in their life in a positive way that fits the circumstances.
As a counselor, I have rejoiced with many in their victories. I have also wept with many over the painful events in their lives. I pray with them. I help them to understand that God truly knows and understands our deep painful emotions.
Proverbs 13:12 (NLT)
12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.
God understands that a hope deferred makes us feel sick in our heart/soul/mind. That deferred hope could possibly be a great loss that has the potential of restoration or maybe a permanent loss that leads to deep grief.
God’s Word tells us that blessed are they that mourn for they shall be comforted. Grief is a process. We keep taking our loss and grief to God for His comfort. Grief because of a death never completely disappears. The pain of this grief eases a little over time, but the grief and ebbs and flows like the tides of God’s ocean. It takes time to create a new normal in life. It is different for every person. Believers do not grieve without hope because Jesus rose from the dead and gives us hope in Him for the resurrection of believers.
There can be hopes of restoration from loss of careers, relationships, finances, a way of life, etc. If that hope is continually deferred it does make the heart sick. God understands. Never give up the hope and make it a matter of prayer to God continually. Continue to do all you can do then keep standing on the foundation of faith in God’s Word. He will never leave nor forsake us. He is a present help in the time of trouble. He will supply all of our needs according to His riches in glory. It just might not be in the way we desire. Trust in the Lord with all of our hearts and lean not to our own understanding. In all of our ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct our path.
No matter what others may say or do, never, never give up. Remind God that your hope is still deferred and you are believing that the dream will be fulfilled as a tree of life at any moment. Let God know that He will be given all the glory and honor in fulfilling the dream. When the disappointment of the unfilled dream hits you on occasion, take it to God in prayer. He understands like no one else your hurting heart.
The devil has nothing to offer but heartache and pain. Yes, there is pleasure in sin for a season, but seasons always come to an end. The majority of people in the world are following the broad way that leads to destruction. Only a few are staying on the narrow path that leads to eternal life. Be determined to be one of the few who will remain faithful to God no matter the circumstances.
Jesus could return for His Bride at any moment to save us from the wrath that is to come upon this ungodly world. God has special plans for his Bride. He will give us rewards according to how we lived our lives for His glory at the Judgment Seat of Christ. There will be a marriage supper of the lamb. At the end of the 7 years of the Great Tribulation, we will come to earth with Jesus Christ on white horses. King Jesus will subdue the devil and his imps and put them in hell for 1,000 years.
King Jesus will set up 1,000 years of peace where we will be ruling and reigning with Him. At the end of that time, King Jesus will loose Satan for a season to deceive those who have evil in their heart. Then King Jesus will have the final victory over Satan and bind him in hell forever. There will be a White Throne Judgment and renovation of this earth with fire. God will create a new heaven and new earth. Only the righteous will inherit the earth and we the Bride will be reigning with our Bridegroom forever and forever from the City of the New Jerusalem that comes down from God out of heaven – so shall we ever be with the LORD JESUS CHRIST, the KING OF KINGS who is the GOD OF GLORY!
No matter our status in life – joyful or sorrowful, we must look unto Jesus who is the author and finisher of our faith!!!!! A song says, “I have hope when trouble comes my way. I have hope since Jesus has come to stay. I have hope, oh yes, when things are not well with me. I have hope. It’s a beautiful hope that sets me free!” This short span of time on earth is nothing to compare to an eternity with our Great God even our Savior Lord Jesus Christ!
© Carol Clemans – July 2017 – Bible teacher 50 years, Certified Pastoral Counselor 25 years, Holy Ghost 62 years! Read ‘about ministry’ page @ www.carolclemans.org – 400+ articles & videos. Love speaking for churches/conferences. Provides nationwide counseling by phone/Skype/Facetime/Facebook video – (636) 448-0121. Watch over 80 teaching videos on Carol Clemans YouTube channel. Ministry ref: Pastor Daniel Batchelor, Dupo, IL.